IF
If you give a woman who likes to remodel and decorate a new kitchen faucet, she'll notice the sink looks even worse than before.
That means she'll want a new sink to match her new faucet. If you get her a new sink to match her new faucet, the countertops will look even more ugly than they currently do. Not to mentioned their out-dated-ness.
You will need to buy new counter tops to match the new sink that matches the new faucet. If you buy her new counter tops, she will notice how unseemly the cupboards look.
So you will again head for the local Home Depot and purchase new cupboards in a nice cherry wood maybe with some glass insets..slightly frosted. (okay slightly frosted with something other than frosting, dried ketchup, mustard, tomato sauce and all manner of things gross).
While you're there, you might as well buy more because we all know there aren't enough cupboards in the kitchen. And we must not forget the installation. Good thing Home Depot delivers and installs.
Once you get the cupboards installed, you'll realize you should have installed the cupboards before the silestone counter tops. Back again to Home Depot ...the silestone counter tops have..well met an untimely demise.
New cupboards and counter tops installed and she will realize the floor really needs replacing. So you'll replace that with...more of the same tired old pergo laminate flooring. But it looks better!
Ahhh...a new kitchen.
Now the woman will think..."The faucet doesn't match the kitchen now. I think we need to replace it."
(Now I do not have a new kitchen. But I am thinking I'll need to replace the kitchen faucet. I let my mind wander last night doing dishes with the spray nozzle.)
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